Law and Order

Law and order in Sudan is nonexistent! In other countries if there is a car accident- it’s called an accident. There is insurance, police, courts, etc, etc. In Southern Sudan there is a 'take justice into your own hands approach', especially when it comes to the army. This makes it worse because they all have guns, are bored, underpaid and still trying to fight the war. Following an accident there is no justice for the victims or perpetrators. Someone else who is around remains responsible and anyone foolish enough to get in the way faces a sort of mob justice.
Two nights ago 5 soldiers showed up at our compound after beating up one of the drivers of a vehicle that we sent out in the field. They had gotten information about the plate number of the vehicle and decided to beat up the wrong guy based on this information. They were actually looking for a different vehicle that was also parked at our compound (how it got here is a long story…). They coincidentally happened to find it here and decided that since the driver had run away that they should take the owner of the car or the car itself. Of course based on no evidence except that they had guns and said so. In the dark night I had to tell five tall shadowy men with guns to leave our compound and to take the vehicle with them and sort it out in the morning. I heard that the punishment was for the owner of the car to pay $1000 for the hospital bills of the injured soldier.
The day after this I got another lesson on the lack of discipline and order among the army. There was a shooting in town when a soldier lost it and shot his friend and another person and in return he was shot himself. The army barrack is in the middle of town so those affected by internal fights are likely to be civilians. Even following the peace agreement, the rule of the gun is still the strongest rule of the land. No need to worry mom - things are fine and I am safe, I just needed to vent about my frustrations of living in such a violent gun ridden place.

Hopelessness

I woke up this morning feeling hopeless. I’m not sure why today, but for some reason I am overwhelmed by the difficulties ahead for Sudan especially the way my work is going. When I think of everything that the country has gone through and the difficulties still ahead it makes me feel like I am wasting my time and lots of money here.

Maybe that is always the difficulty of development work- having a sustainable real impact without wasting resources. The government of the South is still in a nascent state and is unable to do many of the things that they a government should do and then NGOs end up doing it. Government employees are not receiving their salaries, the system is over-inflated with too many employees, and there are allegations of corruption going around. I understand that thework that the local government has to do to rebuilt the country is enormous! Imagine trying to rebuild a legal system, army and police system, property rights, access to health care, water, education, solve tribal conflicts, etc, etc with very limited resources and surrounded by people with guns who have more power than you do. In trying to help them do their job we end up fighting with the local authorities because they are working towards their political interests rather than the interests of the people.

I think this hopelessness came about because of my own personal frustrations with how things work in Sudan and how difficult it is to get anything done! You have to explain something at least 10 times before anything gets done. I'm learning that there is a lack of communication all around with Sudanese and a lack of trust of anyone. Sudanese love to talk but aren't much for putting words into action.
I know there is this sense of hopelessness in general here and people are ready to give up so easily. Take the example of this conversation today:

Me: "We have had a problem with transportation and one of the trucks got stuck in the mud and can't bring participants.
Boss: "Well, it's obvious that the conference is a failure then. We should just cancel it all!"
Me: "Ok, what do you tell the 100 people waiting for us right now? And the three months of work put into this?"
Boss: "Let's just hand it off to the government."

I think I could soon start to adopt the Sudanese giving up attitude...

All of this is compounded by these other frustrations:
- All the shops are closed down in town because of the incident a few days ago, you can feel the tension as you go through town.
- Our fridge is broken (no cold beers), our generator is broken, our printer is broken, and basically every vehicle we have has something wrong with it.
- Our cook is sick and was evacuated today. I'm dying for some good food!
- Mosquitoes are out in full force and are driving me crazy!
- I just want to feel clean and pretty for once! And not sweaty!

On a happier note, I got some photos of children to make me smile today. (but on a more hopeless note, they are all severely malnourished...) I guess I have to focus on the small victories in Sudan or I might lose all hope.